Effective communication is the cornerstone of successful relationships and at the heart of this is the skill of active listening. Active listening is not just about hearing words; it involves understanding, processing, and responding to what someone is saying. Active listeners are more likely to been seen as trustworthy individuals and excellent communicators. The interpersonal skills utilized in active listening can be invaluable to personal and professional communication. Active listening helps build better relationships, improves problem-solving, and enhances productivity. Have you been looking to improve your active listening skills? Here are a few strategies to help.

Remove Distractions

To become a better active listener, the first step is to eliminate distractions. Find a quiet, comfortable place where you can focus on the conversation. Turn off or silence your phone and close any irrelevant tabs on your computer – in fact, stepping away from your computer screen is an even better strategy. Being fully present in the moment sends a clear message that you value the speaker and what they are saying. You could even consider blocking off a set amount of time to dedicate to the conversation. In doing so, both you and the speaker know that the time is intentionally scheduled out of both of your days for this set purpose.

Maintain Eye Contact

Maintaining eye contact is a powerful way to signal your engagement in the conversation. If you are looking around the room, or responding to an email on your computer while having a conversation, it can make the speaker believe that you are not interested in the conversation or have more important things to do. Maintaining eye contact, however, demonstrates that you are giving your full attention to the speaker and are genuinely interested in what they have to say. Body language, including eye contact, can send your speaker different messages whether you are aware of it or not. Other ways to show that you are engaged and actively listening could include nodding along to the conversation, offering a welcoming smile, or even simply making sure that you are not turned away from the person speaking.

Avoid Interrupting

Resist the urge to interrupt or interject with your own thoughts while another person is speaking. Sometimes it can be difficult to hold your thoughts if you are especially passionate about the subject at hand, but it is best to take a moment first. Allow the speaker to finish their point before responding. In doing so, you gain more time to fully grasp what the other person is saying. You may find that what you wanted to address was already at the forefront of the speakers mind. By getting the full picture, you decrease the chances of offending the speaker and minimize miscommunication. Interruptions are often seen as disrespectful and can disrupt the flow of the conversation. “The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen,” famously quoted Dr. Ralph G. Nichols

Paraphrase and Reflect

One of the most effective active listening techniques is paraphrasing. After a speaker has made a point, restate it in your own words. This not only shows that you are paying attention but also helps clarify and confirm your understanding of their message. Reflecting spoken words back to an individual also helps build rapport and trust. If you did not hear the person correctly or misinterpreted their meaning, this now provides the opportunity for you both to reach a mutual point of understanding. Demonstrating that you are actively making the effort to understand the speaker also reassures them that you are both open to and interested in hearing their thoughts.

Ask Open-Ended Questions

Encourage the speaker to delve deeper into their thoughts and feelings by asking them open-ended questions. These questions require more than a simple yes or no response and encourage the speaker to provide additional information and insights. One powerful example of an open-ended phrase is, “please share with me more about that?” Open-ended questions can also help prevent disagreements. For example, if you have conflicting ideas about how a new project should be handled, you could ask, “how did you come to that conclusion?” or “did you explore any alternatives?” This will not only bring you into the mindset and thought processes of the other person, but it will also better inform your decision making going forward.

Show Empathy

Empathy is a key component of active listening. Put yourself in the speaker’s shoes and try to understand their perspective and emotions. Expressing empathy can be as simple as genuinely saying, “I can see how that would be challenging” or “I appreciate your perspective.” You don’t need to have a similar experience to relate with your speaker on, but simply recognizing the feelings that someone else may be going through and validating them can go a long way in terms of building trust in your personal and professional relationships.

Be Patient

Active listening requires patience. Some people take longer to articulate their thoughts or may need time to process their emotions. Allow the speaker to speak at their own pace without rushing them. Silence can be a powerful tool in active listening, as it gives the speaker space to collect their thoughts and continue the conversation. Even if you think you know where they are going with their thoughts, try to avoid finishing their sentences for them or cutting them off. This can lead to frustration and may even throw the speaker off of their train of thought.

Avoid Judgment

Suspend judgment when actively listening. Don’t jump to conclusions or make assumptions about the speaker’s intentions or beliefs. Remember that active listening is about understanding, not evaluating or critiquing. Avoid responding with phrases like “You should have” or “I would have done it differently.”

Practice Mindfulness

Practicing mindfulness can improve your active listening skills by helping you stay fully present in the moment. If your mind is flooded with the thoughts of other tasks on your to-do list, you can’t create the space to be fully open to new ideas. Mindfulness techniques, such as deep breathing and meditation, can reduce stress and enhance your ability to focus on the speaker and their words. Explore mindfulness apps such as Calm or Headspace.

Provide Feedback

After the speaker has shared their thoughts, provide feedback to let them know you were listening and to ensure both parties have the same understanding of the conversation. Offer a summary of what they said and express your understanding and support.

Active listening is a vital skill that can improve both personal and professional relationships. By following these strategies, you can become a more effective active listener. Remember that active listening is not just about hearing words but about truly understanding and connecting with another individual. As you hone your active listening skills, you’ll find that you are better equipped to resolve conflicts, collaborate effectively, and build stronger, more meaningful connections with others.

To stay up to date on news and resources such as this and other topics of importance to the real estate industry, subscribe to the free CRE Insight Journal Newsletter using this link.